Remember,

A student at our university committed suicide last week.  She had been in one of my classes last year, sitting on the front row, right in front of me. She was a hard-worker, smart, and was not shy about asking a question or challenging another person's opinion.  She was quiet and humble, but not afraid. As a parent, I look at her and her sisters and brothers and imagine them being a source of "pride" for their families (pride is a whole other subject in this culture).  As a teacher, I "love" my students in that I have great respect for them and want to see them succeed.  If I didn't love my students in this way, I wouldn't put up with the downsides of the job. When that semester of our class together first started, she told me briefly about her ongoing struggles with depression and reassured me that she was managing it okay, and I know she had care from within the school and of course, I thought of her and prayed for her to make it through because life comes in these phases and maybe the next one or the one after that wouldn't be haunted by that fear or anxiety or maybe it would but maybe she would find a new way of shouldering it all.  But she didn't.  And suicide in this culture is a major sin and I understand that the family was not happy.  not happy at all.  that she was attending our school, that she attended because of some now silenced desire from her own mind, heart, and/or soul.  So the reaction here has been whispers among the students and silence from the administration. The silence is not what the administration wants but is what it must do because the student's family has requested it.  They don't approve of us or what we do or maybe it has something to do with the student's gender.  I'm not sure.  There was a "funeral" (again, different from one at home), more of a respectful visitation to her house, to sit with the family.  I was invited and wanted to go but couldn't, and then I heard that another female faculty member went and the tension was very bad because the family did not approve.

But even if silence is what the family wants, this student is not silent in my heart.  And her struggles and her story are a slap-in-the-face re-realization that here, a fast paced change to daily/public life is outpacing cultural/private change in ways that will remain unknown to me. Not because I don't want to know but because I cannot know and in a culture of privacy, I am not invited to hear.  It would seem like it must be a paradox of inspiration, amazement, and hope combined with an anxiety and fear.  It would seem like, because of the pace of the change, that it will put a special burden on the current generation of kids and young adults.  They will bear the load of many generations of change on their singular shared shoulders.  Seems like it must be like entering a black hole, anticipation of what might be and the constant threat of being pulled apart, disintegrated.

I cannot forget this student.  She is why I'm here and why I should be concerned about what my presence here means.

Le Petit Gardin: Tres Fantastique!

Thanks to a lot of work by Guru, Babu, Shiva, and others as well as to a final annual break in the temperatures, Le Petit Garden (our back 40...feet) has, as we say, "Gone Bla-Dow" which means had a growth spurt.  When John moved in here, this was a patch of bad grass and a blank wall.  There also used to be a big tree over where the smaller date palm is now (lower left), but the compound took all such trees out as they were interfering with plumbing. I miss that tree as a place for birds and a key provider of shade.  John does not miss it, because it also sucked away all the water that then couldn't get to the other plants.

Yes, the sky is white/yellow (no clouds, no blue). But now look at the bougainvillea!

John has been training a lot of viney things to go over the wall and up the trellises and up the poles to the palapa. I need additional photos of that area and will post shortly.

On another bright note, sometimes Shiva, after trimming things up, brings me bouquets like these (all are from him).  He often ties in sprigs of herbs like basil, mint, lavender, or curry leaves, so they smell delicious.  

Grateful for the cooler, beautiful respite that is our backyard and for all the work and planning that have gone into it.

A Night at the Russian Ballet

Oh, this was full of awesome.

A Russian ballet group, including dancers from several troupes such as the Bolshoi, came to Doha for a performance.   It was a collection of "classic" (i.e., popular) pieces from the standards--Swan Lake, Nutcracker, Don Quixote--as well as several more modern dances.  It was like a box of ballet chocolates where all of them are superb even if one or two are your favorites.

Hannah wanted to know how many "kicking donkeys" would be in that one called Don Quixote, and I assured her that, as a child who is very close to her mother, she will go far in life.  My Texas people should also rest assured that the Native Accent is being learned, even 8,000 miles away.

The tickets for the show were surprisingly expensive ($240 for the three of us in "third class," and Hannah was 1/2 price), but it was worth every penny for many reasons. It was a true splurge, and something I would have either not been able or willing to afford in Texas.





John in his cookie duster and the Princess in her gown. Of course, ballet + gold dress = bun wrapped in golden ribbon.  The other audience members were in a funny array of things, from jeans to ball gowns.  It was great to be among a wide array of cultures and characters. Several friends, including the two Russian ladies that I count as friends and our talented, beautiful Russian music teacher, all went.  A taste of home and a source of well-deserved pride!

The flash was bright, and the Qatar National Convention Center theater was gorgeous.  The slope of the seating meant that even in the "third class" section, we could see just fine.

The seats were also large and comfortable, which meant I was immediately afraid that I might just go to sleep as soon as the lights were down, but that turned out not to be the case.  The dancing and music were beautiful and paying attention was not difficult, even for a tired middle-aged woman.

John brought some Very Fine Binoculars, which I never get did get to try out, but the girlchild said they were useful, especially at spotting bogies and blemishes on her mother's face.

The show didn't start until 8:30, well past bedtime, but Hannah was excitedly on the edge of her seat through the first half (six dances), then she and Jean Cheri split a coke at intermission.  At the start of the second half, she decided that my lap looked even more comfortable than the seats, and by no more than 30 seconds into the first dance...

 The convention center is HUGE.  Big enough to have people who drive visitors in gold carts through the indoor center to get from one end (theater) to the other (exit to garages). Thankfully, she woke up about 1/2 way to the car.  She has gotten bigger, as is appropriate at almost 6.5 years old.

More Cloud Pictures

Usually, we get a day of fall rain, but none since the one day in mid-September.  There's been rain in the northern part of the country, but not where we are.  But the clouds have been afreakingmazing over the past week, and the sunsets have been show-stopping.  Yes, I know that I've just posted cloud pictures, but now I have some more.  If you can't celebrate cool fronts, turning leaves, pumpkins, big bowls of warm soup on cold days, or thunderstorms, then you find something to mark the season change.  That and we spend many months of the year, especially the summer, with no clouds at all.

Parting of the clouds to reveal an orange-pink time of sunset. The sun sets right now about about 5:15. By mid-December, that will be ~4:30.  It gets pitch black very quickly, right now by 5:30.

This was incredible, like a bowl of clouds with the sun shooting up out of the middle.

This was mid-day. The 3D effect of this was exceptional but doesn't show up much on film.  What you have is that greyish smear towards the bottom left was low-hanging.  The big white smear covering the sun was mid-level, and the stratus clouds were way up high.  And the blue (instead of khaki)!  It reminded me of a Big. Texas. Sky.

Doha Halloween 2012

I am proud to say that the people of Doha know how to do Halloween just right!  In the two years past, we have been lucky to have a "carnival" of games set up at the club house, which was a lot of fun.  But this year, Halloween fell during the Eid break, and I guess because no one was here to organize it, the carnival didn't happen.  In fact, I was sort of worried that there wouldn't be many trick or treaters because the compound has been very deserted this week.  I can also only imagine how much work it is to organize that carnival...great respect for the previous leaders and no wish to step up to leading it myself.

Even without the carnival, though, we had a fantastic time trick or treating last night.  Our new friends/neighbors/colleagues came over with this son (precious 2 year old boy who did an outstanding job of being a fully suited-up football player!), we went on an hour-long candy run, and then we treated ourselves to a feast from Turkey Central along with some wooden train-playing time and a good visit.  It was an excellent evening in every way.

The weather has finally "broken" here, and the evenings are now getting very pleasant.  I remember many Halloweens in Texas that we were sweating in shorts and much of any costume (especially plastic masks! ugh!) were no fun to wear. My guess is that it was in the mid-80's last night, which after a long summer of 120+ actually feels wonderful.  And there was a nice breeze. And no sand in the air.  Score!

Here are some pictures...

Hannah was The Tooth Fairy, which was an especially big hit with the real-life dentist who lives on the opposite side of the compound.  He gave her two treats instead of one, just to cement their alliance.  Here, our Tooth Fairy is posing with our Cat Full of Awesome, imported last year from Target and plugged into a step-down transformer so the motor won't get melted by the 240 electrical current here.  The cat is one of those "blow up" decorations with the fan inside, about 6 feet long from tip to tail.  It's lighted head moves back and forth.

This photo just appreciates the chaos of seeing so many kids out in costume.  Not sure where all these little people have been hiding over the past week, but the streets were pretty full!  It's also a lot of fun to have trick or treating among so many cultures and accents: American, English, Scottish, Swedish, Danish, Dutch, French, Russian, Filippino, Jordanian, Lebanese, and many others.

Best quote of the night: Hannah went to her very first house (so her bag was empty), in which a colleague lives with his wife and three kids (Hannah's age and younger).  The Mom is English, and the kids have English accents.  The oldest child, a precocious boy around Hannah's age, put one tiny peppermint in her big, empty bag and said "My mummy doesn't wont yoh tummee tew hut frum tew much candee!"  I can't replicate the accent very well, but hearing that tiny mint echo in that huge bag at the same time this proclamation was made was a funny/cute moment.

Carving pumpkins here remain outrageously expensive (in 2010, we made our own out of papier mache, beach balls, yellow tissue paper, and orange lacquer), and this house solved the problem with a jack-o-melon!  LOVED THIS!  We'll be copy catting next year if I can remember...

This was the scariest house in terms of decorations.  Hannah was brave but still made me come stand by the steps.  It reminded me of the giant (stuffed) spider she used to adore when she was about 2 years old.  She carried that damned thing around all the time.

Hank was our at-home hero, handing out the candy to the hooligans.  That white paper with the jack-o-lantern on it, taped to the door right behind his head, is the "code" that tells our house is open for trick or treating.  When you run out of loot (or if you don't want to participate), then you take it off your door.  A good system!  Hank not only handed out three gigantic bags of candy but also met the Turkey Central delivery person, paid for the food (with money I left), and got it to the kitchen counter ready for us to dig in.  

No photos of the birthday boy.  He was at his friend Daniel's house raising all sorts of Halloween trouble in another compound.  I've had a bad case of the autumn blues (missing home and this time of year...the pumpkin patches, cold fronts, and trees sort-of-changing color), but this evening was a really good boost.